Anyone else with me? I feel like if I go into my daughter’s room, there is another tub of slime made every day. I mean, I have never even seen her make it, it just keeps multiplying. I haven’t even bought a single ingredient for this stuff, but yet, it keeps appearing in my house. I have tried to hide it. I have tried to ban it. I just cannot get rid of it, and for the record, if you can’t tell, I hate it.

What’s the point? I want to know the backstory on who came up with this. Was it the glue guys or the contact solution guys? Every time I go to the store with my daughter, there is a need for one of those two things even though there are 50 tubs of it in her room. When I finally get control of the mess, there is some other parent having a party and giving it away (because I really need more at my house). So, I just need to know when this phase is going to end.

So, the second half of this is: If we, as parents, don’t get together and make a pact now to never speak of this slime again, we will be forced to relive it again. As the writer and philosopher George Santayana said: “Those who do not learn history are doomed to repeat it.” What I mean by that is: All of us parents who have younger kids, who have not started making it yet, will soon get to the age where they want to make it. We must ban together to get rid of this mess once and for all.

The question is: How do we get rid of it? I think I have a plan, but again, we all have to get onboard. Step 1: Slowly get rid of all the slime in the house. Step 2: Agree to never make it at parties or sleepovers to send home with the other children. Finally, Step 3: Anytime a child talks about slime, we must all say that it turns out that “slime is not safe.” Now, this may not be 100 percent true, but it is true that it is not safe for my carpet or my sanity, so I’m okay with a little white lie. That’s it! All the slime will be gone, and this can be over. Let me know if you have a better plan as I am open to anything. ■