Your room is a mess, the house has 1,000 things that need to be done, there are parties to get to, and presents to buy. Yes, it is December again. Please bear with me as this may not be the normal column you are used to reading, but I do think it is timely and will help with our children. More on that later…

You see, with all the things we have going on this time of year, we have very little time to get done what we need to, and that goes for our children, spouses, and work life. Just when you think you have gotten past it all and are ready to start fresh, everyone you know is asking, “What’s your New Year’s resolution?” Do not even get me started on that one. How am I supposed to have a New Year’s resolution after being so worn out and so far behind on last year’s?

It is simple…HCIH?: How can I help?

You see, we get so stressed about what is not being done, and we push our children to get things done, and let’s be honest, it turns into yelling punishments, bad days, bad nights, and lost weekends. Instead of all this, take a step back and try and have a new outlook on things.
Get out of their way and let them do, and just ask, “How can I help?” At first, this will get you some funny looks and confused faces, but stick with it.

Your room is not clean. How can I help? Now, you might get a, “Come help me clean it,” but that is not the answer. Think more along the lines of, “Can I help you donate some of your toys to the children who are not as fortunate as you, so you have less to clean?”

You’re home late. How can I help? Should we stop letting you go out, so you don’t have to worry about getting home on time?

Most of the time, after a few days of this, they will all learn there is not much you can do to help them do their job, and they will get it done.

Pro tip: This works great in your work life, also. Get out of their way, and just ask, “How can I help?” Learning to do this now and practicing for a few weeks in December will make that New Year’s resolution a snap. Just remember: Ask, “How can I help?” to everything.

As one of my favorite people said, “You can have everything in life you want, if you will just help other people get what they want.” –Zig Ziglar

Merry Christmas! ■