Bless Their Heart


It is a widely-known witticism that when you talk about someone in the South, one can self-pardon by simply adding the words, “bless their heart.” The reality is, what is being said rarely does actually bless anybody. It seems harmless enough, until it plays out in the theater of our family dramas, causing pointless division and hard feelings. It is no blessing at all when real relationships are being destroyed.

What is behind all the phony romanticism of family gossip? Most often an actor who, once all the costuming and makeup is off, is controlled by spirits of superiority, anger, envy, attention seeking, and even boredom. I have personified each and every one of these spirits and performed to the dominion of evil to thunderous applause. And each time it was over, I was left feeling dishonored. I know I am not alone. Now that we see our raw reflections, what can we do to transform ourselves into true “heart bless-ers?”

A good starting point might be to prayerfully explore why a family member demands so much of our individual and collective energy and attention. Are we being directed to personify a harmful spirit, or is the Spirit of God giving us the opportunity to redirect ourselves into a healthy place of heart-blessing, where we can all flourish? We can also do what good actors do and put ourselves into the skin of the other person. This makes the other person real. We cannot fully know someone else’s burdens, but God does. In fact, Jesus put Himself in our shoes in his earthly debut as Savior of the world. It was His breakout role that blessed every heart.

Our families deserve our very best, whether they be biological, adopted, friends, church, community, or work. If we really want to bless their hearts, and we don’t have anything nice to say, then perhaps another Southern saying serves us best – “then just say nothin’ at all.” I believe God honors that, too. ■

Be the first to review this item!


Bookmark this

01 Oct 2018


By Rev. Kennon Pickett

Recent Articles more articles

Real World and Online Predators: How to Keep Your Child Safe

According to the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, in 2018 alone, there were more than 1,600 attempted child abductions by strangers.

Allergic Asthma

in Pathways to Parenting

Runny nose and red eyes that come on every time the pollen blows are typical allergy symptoms many of us deal with this time of year. But when the lungs are involved, an allergic response can include asthma.

Remote Learning Challenge

in Health and Wellness, School

I am starting to see more students begin to adjust to digital learning. I’m so proud of how hard they are working and amazed at their resilience. I know they wouldn’t be handling it as well without your support, so I commend you for that.

It's the Day Before the Hurricane, Everyday

It's the Day Before the Hurricane, Everyday

in A Day in the Life of Dad

We're all hanging out as a family every day. We have to learn new ways to work with each other; our children have to learn a new way to learn. We're rushing to get groceries, we’re seeing empty shelves, and we’re looking everywhere for toilet paper.

Featured Listings more listings

Barn Hill Preserve

Barn Hill Preserve

in Party Venues

The best part of having your party with Barn Hill Preserve is that you can either have your party at Barn Hill Preserve, or you can settle in at home, and they will come to your home or venue. The cost is $400 for the sloth and four to six other anim

Dunham School, The

in Private Schools

The Dunham School is Baton Rouge's leading college-preparatory school serving students in PreK3-12th grade. As an independent, non-denominational Christian school, Dunham is committed to educating students in mind, body, and spirit.

Newsletter